I have so many reasons to be thankful that I decided to make contact with John and ask for his help.  He has done so much to change my life for the better.  I’d been managing okay; but I’d had no real sense of purpose, and most of the time life just seemed to be very confusing and exhausting.  Now I have a greater understanding of what my needs are and how to go about getting those needs met.  John has given me some great emotional ‘tools’, and taught me how to use these in order to maximise my potential and significantly reduce my anxiety levels.

I first went to see John when I needed help to get through some challenging medical situations.  I’d been feeling extremely anxious and had questioned whether I could even proceed with the surgery I needed.  Thanks to John’s kind and individualised intervention, I was able to cope with the treatment, experienced minimal stress, and had little or no need for pain medications afterwards – and I went on to make a speedy recovery too!

Having been greatly impressed with the way John had supported me with the medical challenges, I began to talk with him about other unresolved emotional difficulties.  I knew that some of these things would be extremely distressing to discuss, but John made that process so much easier.  In fact, I quickly discovered it wasn’t necessary to sit there for hours and hours going over all these painful events, re-living the distress and terror.  The therapeutic techniques John uses avoid the need for lengthy upsetting sessions.  Instead, I simply relaxed in a nice comfy chair while John spoke to me, took away the fear and anxiety, and I felt so much better really quickly.

Throughout my life I’d had a sense of somehow ‘not fitting in’, being ‘out of sync’ with those around me, feeling I ‘wasn’t quite getting it’ in social situations.  I seemed to be repeatedly worn out by situations that everyone else appeared to cope with very easily.  I simply blamed myself for my (perceived) inadequacies, andI saw my ongoing difficulties with social situations as a personal failure.  Very soon after my initial therapy sessions John realised that it was likely I was on the autism spectrum.  However, it was important for John to keep an open mind at that point and make sure the various life challenges I’d experienced were not the cause of those autistic-like traits.  

Once John had helped me to deal with the past challenges, he saw that the remaining day to day difficulties did fit in with Asperger’s Syndrome and so he shared his thoughts about this with me.  At that time I knew very little about autism and, like many people, I had the misperception that only boys were diagnosed with the condition.  John explained to me that girls and women could also have the condition, but often females are better at disguising the traits.  The condition presents differently in females, and it is not unusual for it to be missed or attributed to other emotional health difficulties.  Suddenly things started to make sense for me.

Although the route to formal diagnosis was difficult and frustrating at times due to lack of provision for adult assessments via statutory services in Guernsey, John supported me throughout the process.  In July 2015 I met with a diagnostician from London, and was given a formal diagnosis of autism spectrum disorder, namely Asperger’s Syndrome.  John had been right, and he had seen the subtleties of my condition that everyone else had missed.

Living with undiagnosed Asperger’s for more than fifty years had obviously resulted in many difficulties.  I attended school in the 1970s/1980s, and little was known about autism at that time (especially how the condition presents in females).  Later on, people in the medical profession missed it too.  Luckily for me, John did spot the signs.  I’m now able to make sense of my life, and no longer blame myself for my difficulties.  I understand that there is a very good reason why certain situations are challenging for me.  The random approach to coping strategies that I’d unknowingly been using for most of my life, can now be developed and refined due to my new knowledge about things like sensory sensitivity and sensory overload.  I am learning to manage my condition so much better.  I don’t get so exhausted because I recognise the kinds of situations that are likely to leave me drained.  This means I can either choose not to get involved in some activities or only do so occasionally; or use my new coping strategies to help me enjoy activities in a way that works for me.  

I see my Asperger’s diagnosis as a hugely positive thing as it means I am now better able to enjoy life – in a different way.  John’s recognition of my Asperger’s has enabled me to be myself, accept myself, and value and respect myself for being the person I am.   It means I can now design a life that works for me, and be happy and fulfilled.

I’m discovering that I am capable of far more than I would ever have dreamed of.  I may have a slightly unconventional approach to some things, or use unusual coping strategies, but that is perfectly okay.  Autism is simply a different way of experiencing the world.  Since I see and hear things more intensely, it is quite possible that the way I experience the world is a lot more colourful and interesting! 

Without John’s knowledge and expertise, I would still be struggling to make sense of my life.  I suspect I’ve been a challenging client at times, but John has always remained totally supportive and understanding.  His willingness to look beyond the initial presenting difficulties, and his ability to understand people and what ‘makes them tick’, means that he has a very special way of making a significant difference in people’s lives.  I have found that if I want to achieve something (but for some reason feel I cannot), John will make it possible for me to do so.  All I need to do is tell him what it is that I need or want to do, then allow him to help me.  Turns out the things I believed would be really difficult or even impossible, can be really easy and truly enjoyable.